Friday, April 10, 2015

101 - Belowstairs Chatter

“Hot, hot, hot coming in behind you! Hot pan behind you!”

“Tray of glasses behind you!  Don’t step back you idiot!”

“Who is this new Ambassador anyway?  I’ve never heard of a Fe-hin-as!”

“Like most of the world on this side of the Earthsphere! Look out!”

Forzak, I need more butter melted. Boy! Oh, arse-balls, bollocks, and boluses! Why did he have to pick tonight to get sick? Girl! Hop into the cold room and get me more butter!”

“That's all for Rosy and Toasted! They need to have their appetites coaxed!

“Wow, no seclusion? They're both big as houses now!

 “Shush your gossip about our Imperatrix and first Sera!

“Fancy that. Another bare-handed country.

“Bare fisted I’ve heard, look out you’re boiling over!”

“Trays of spoons coming through! Someone get another pot-pig into the pit! This is going to be a big one!”

“Check that hot cistern, they can’t wash dishes if they run out of hot water! Mel!”

“Here, boss. It’s going to be the biggest dinner since Solstice!”

“Fish delivery! Porters! Hop to it! It’s not getting any fresher as it sits. Cold room… NOW!”

“That bin of potatoes has all sprouted, chef.”

“Shen… sell them to the growers as sets, the rest can go to the pigs with wings!”

“Erl…” “I know, I know, the silver needs to be re-polished and that--- what?”

“I hear the Fehinnans sold some wicked magical weapons to the Alliance in the war.  Killed a General gruesome-like…turned him into a giant toadstool.”

“Stop with the rumours! Too much talk! I heard it was fungus balls.  Hayel, would you quit using that noisome rag and get a new cloth!”

“They have a God-King, they say.”

“Our Ten’ll kick His pretentious mortal butt if He tries anything.”

“Yeah, Sparky sent navy out to help Srians… they got slave-baracoons on t’Dust coast I heard.”

“And wings too. Ye’ saw ‘em all leaving yesterday?”

“So… make nice, nice, wi’ the politician guy, kick they butts right off the land.”

“Yup. Hey! You’re scorchin’ that! Set up the spit-dogs t’ run a bit slower and move it out away from the flame!”

“Kick ‘em all off if they’re trying to move in on us…”

“Just make the food, set it up for that Zak to dazzle ‘em, get her into his new household!  Make a GOOOOD impression!”

“Huh, she speaks Fehinnan, I heard.”

“Temple’s in on it, too with that weird Mahid taken-up.”

“That’s above my touch, Dorn. Here! You! Wash these lettuces!  I’m going to need a hundred plates set up in that alcove by dinner!”

“How’s the grandbaby comin’?”

“Good enough. It’s a pain having the kids sleeping in ‘t Temple but they’ll be able to come home soon the priestesses say.  Once everythin’s settled in to grow, y’know.”

“Too much information, Bel.  Give ‘em my best.”

“Sure--- oy! You’re about to spill that.  Take that out of the sink and go peel every single one!  And if I find any shells in them after, I’ll get chef to fire you!”

“Yes, ser!”

“Hot, hot, hot coming through! Coming behind you! Hot!”

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